Blog #5 – Crimes Against Wisdom, A Yogi Gone Bad, Consciously!
This is the 5th blog in an ongoing series of a yogin’s intentional “crimes against wisdom.” This series will highlight my experience of purposefully ignoring 10 years of training in yoga, meditation, ayurveda and psychology in favor of performing typical current cultural behaviors of modernity. It will catalog all the negative symptoms endured, explanations of the principles broken, insights gained along the way and the entire “recovery process” as I return to a life based on staples of natural wisdom. You can find the 1st introductory blog here, and you can sign on for the RSS feed, here by choosing the appropriate link in the top right corner of the page. Please also feel free to “like” our FB page: here follow us on Twitter, here and share the fruits of this experiment with your friends.
Our Children Need Real Role Models
As I notice my breath has a slight wheeze to it now because I am so badly out of shape I look at my 9-month old boy, Rudi, and I think: I can’t do this anymore. I am seriously jonesing to “get back on track.” It is not just because I want to feel good, or even because I like to think I have some measure of control about being able to stick around long enough to see my kid have grandchildren. There is more to it than my own selfish benefit.
One critic of this blog wrote to me and stated, “How can you purposefully treat yourself this way? How do you know you won’t die tomorrow?” His point was about the karmic problem of dying in a disheveled state, which from an Eastern perspective will make big trouble in the after-death states and/or in rebirth.
I took his words to heart, both in the way he meant them, but also in the perspective of of hanging out with my son. What kind of role-model am I providing him, right now? He isn’t quite at the age where he is obviously copying everything I do, but signs of it are showing. Nevertheless, millions of impressions are being imprinted in his neural grooves. Are these not seeds that will bear fruition?
Not only do I want my boy to see me with a sparkle in my eye, vibrant, nimble, active and full of vigor but I also want him to see me living in a sacred way, low to the earth, still and quiet, deep in meditative prayer. I want to teach him to stop and smell the flowers. Mustn’t I, then, do the same? There is no place for hypocrisy in a life worth living.
This morning we were all jet-lagged and I had to be up walking Rudi around our friend’s Bangkok apartment at sunrise. As much as I can choose to be a moron in this experiment I can’t neglect to rock my son to sleep to the sound-feeling of chanting that he has become accustomed to. Saturated daily in an ancient language’s praise of the various attributes of god/nature, Rudi has an infectiously good character whose lucky birth has afforded him an extraordinary life.
There is something about the stillness of the morning sunrise that draws one into the depths of their own experience and makes it almost impossible to not feel something we tend to call “spiritual.” Crimes or no crimes, merely being with what is will often overwhelm the ego’s insistence on suffering. It is my duty to join my son in this space, which he already knows so well, and to ensure that he sees that THIS is what is cool about life. This is what it means to be successful. This is what matters.
Everything else is fine and possible: sports, parties, business, achievement, friends, experiments – it really is, as they say, all good. But, THIS is the base, that if accessed, includes all that and informs it with a sense of ease, joy, peace, wisdom, compassion and love. The ability to just be, to be absorbed in the totality of just this, is the only thing I NEED to teach my son. It is the only thing and it is everything.
This is why I can’t wait to be through with this stupid experiment! I am sick and tired of:
- Ignoring my impulse to pray, to reach into the stillness of my heart and ask questions that I know don’t have answers, and to wait for answers that don’t make sense except in that their presence fills me with a love for all things and an unconditioned peace. I am tired of feeling anxious in the wake of neglecting this natural human craving for abiding in the quietude of infinity.
- Ignoring my daily rituals of offering thanks to my ancestors and gods for this precious human birth. It is not that gods require worship – beware of those that do – it is that it is good for us to humble ourselves before such an awesome reality.
- Neglecting my monthly full moon responsibility to pray for those who are sick and suffering. It is customary to use the extroardinary power of the full moon to pray for others. Aligning one’s self to such natural cyclical habits is a medicine whose effect can not be measured.
- Hurrying to the next errand and not taking the time to hold the door for someone, say hello to a stranger, smile with someone looking to connect. This simple gesture of my true nature is awful to ignore. It feels terrible. Who cares that I accomplish a few more tasks?
- Refusing to treat my body as a living temple by not eating according to elemental constitution and/or environmental situation (read about harmonizing the elements, here), by refusing to stretch into the sacred poses we call yoga, by running amok from one distraction to the next without taking time to stop, slow down, breathe, and rest – this is fucking insane! Excuse my profanity, but I can’t help it now… this is purely retarded.
Do you get the picture? I clearly do. Life as a human-doing is so mediocre at best. I wonder if more people would choose to live more wholesomely if they knew that they were eeking out about 2% of the joy and contentment that is characteristic of their true nature by chasing their tails in the pursuit of comfort and “happiness.”
I see that this blog has gotten a little “out there.” Maybe a lot of folks can’t relate exactly to what I am talking about. But, while the specific things I have been neglecting (listed above) may not be typical, ignoring this whole “spiritual” category of life certainly is. There are infinite ways to access the energies I have written about, but all of them require time, attention, effort, love and prioritizing.
That all said, in the next blog I will reel it in and get back to some more nitty-gritty crimes against wisdom that we can all relate to.
In the meantime, perhaps you are inspired to hear shameless plug #2 as an opportunity rather than as spam, but I just reworked the online Energy of Mind Therapy offerings to make them more widely affordable. In the context of the article above I will make note that all past and current clients will attest to the workability of these offerings and the practical manner which they are applied to the way you live your life. In other words, I am not going to encourage you to move to Thailand and become a full time yogi! (unless you want me too ). Check us out: here.